try smth else

You re nervous – she said – relax, let me make massage of hands.
Some people’ve got power, “what a hands” we say – when u feel trembling, when it sends shivers down ur spine. He touches u lightly – and u flinch. She was manicurist – and for one hour and half I fell in love with her strong identity.
(Yes! Manicure! First time may be for a couple of years, пальчики, которые целуют. Должны быть красивыми. И которые не целуют – тоже. Ведь будут целовать. Пальчики).

Calm down – she repeated. Why u nervous so much?
I kept silence a minute. Tried to relax my fingers and felt tension again.

We hand in our project today – I smiled. – 3 months of work. I m working for an architectural agency - I forestall her question. – and today we hang in a project of us – everybody is so exited – u cant imagine.
U will be successful – she said – I feel it. It’s s good excitement.
May be. I hope. We worked really much. U know – this way I like and don’t like in the same time – 3or 4 month u work like hell- I mean – like hell – even spending a nights in the office – oh we had even sleeping places there. That’s great, nice, when u draft something on the desk and somebody is sleeping under the desk in the same time – I can’t imagine more closing situation actually, some army quarters may be. We become really friends meanwhile, really good one, I’m one girl in this agency actually – such a big agency and I’m one – strange isn’t it? Like my brothers they are. And then 3-4 month u re free, once a week in a office, can even leave somewhere, nice no?

I told a lot more. About my former-fiancé. About my man on. My past. My attitude to past.
I was so sincere in the moment of telling absolutely fakes.
She told me too much may be. And I don’t know a second if it’s real life. About her children. 4 children. And 2 adopted children. About her husband. About happiness. About his death. About months of depression. About light. About work. About Moscow.
I m leaving Moscow – and I feel such a relief. And such a disbelief.
As usual.
I never believe.
I was so sincere telling these fakes.